The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

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Rabbit Burner
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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Rabbit Burner » Thu May 10, 2018 8:08 am

THE FINAL CHAPTER CHAPTER V – Khri…….

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
As you hunker down for the night in the old forest, you listen to tales told by your guide: "fingers" the Valorian Sewer Warden....or Sanitation man as they are more commonly called by the commoners....You listen as the campfire plays shadows off his scarred face, tales of two headed crocks and devious Rat Men....the forest is mysteriously quiet, as though the forest itself were listening to the yarns of the scarred warden....

Rabbit Burner
29 rabbits all sat transfixed around the fire listening to tales of yore

John D
The Gargoyle is mystified by the spilt beans. He imagines they form an pattern, a vision, .....an image.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
ZZZzzzzz... ARggnmfmblfbfmble ... zzzzZZZZzzz....

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Indeed....

The Knightess
The Knightess shrugged slightly. Not sure. I just spilled a few beans back there. No big deal.

Rabbit Burner
I think the Big Ear clan might have eaten all the beans .... sorry

Angkor Ravenwing
"Commoners said something about earth trembling" Angkor puts his hands and his ear on the ground, trying to sense some movement.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
from out of the shadows...the watchman sees a humanoid shape...all look up from the campfire to see a.....trembling Orc! All alone and wide eyed!

Rabbit Burner
It better not be one of those rabbit eating Orcs or there will be trouble

The Knightess
A deep low buzzing fills the campsite. It is a sound that makes no sense and it is not of the forest. Low and humming. Perhaps the beat of wings, or more aliens than that, like the rumble and groan of locus but there are no fields to be found.

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Come hither friend. Warm yourself by or fire. Beneath my cloak i grasp my sigil of office ready to fire its offensive magics if assaulted.

JK
[just wait till someone from environmental monitoring department comes out and sees the illegal BBQ, boar hunting and rabbit control using fireballs without a license]

The Knightess
At the buzzing the orc's eyes flash and he moves furthar into the campsite

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
As you may know...there is a truce currently between the City and the Orcs of the Hills....many of them speak common....as does this one: In a guttural deep voice he snarls..."my clan. they all died"...

John D
I don't have enough croissants for the orc (...embarrassing)

Angkor Ravenwing
They died... or were killed?

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
"I saw the flash of magic....fire....I followed it to you....humans...."

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
**ZZzz.* .. Wha!? who's there? where am I?! Ah, yes... oh, I feel a migrane... where's that flask? Hm we got Orcs with us now?

Rabbit Burner
Told you that fireball was a bad idea

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Yes... the pork is a little over done, I prefer it medium rare. Fireball spell is not the best way to prepare pork dinner, it seems.

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Noble orc, we too suffered attack from fire and have come here to seek the source of distress about this Forest.

The Knightess
The Knightess elbows Rabbit

Rabbit Burner
ouch!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[@DW I think we came under friendly fire ... ball]

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
(go ahead and tell him who cast that fireball... If you dare.)

The Knightess
Hush Sigma. No need to distress this fine fellow.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
"I am the one called-Ghanash-Kackhu!" brother of the one legged, and son of the spitting jerkoff!

Rabbit Burner
the sound of 30 smirking rabbits fill the campsite at the mention of 'Spitting Jerkoff'

justin
it seems we share a common goal, ghan...Ghana.... can I call you George?

John D
Get Justin (the-No-Legged), he can parley!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Well, Orc... that's a long name. I'm Sir Sigma of the One, and I've got a tipple of fire water for you, if you like... it chases the darkness and tightens yer loins.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
My family was cast out from the tribe for being to friendly....we wanted not to....ravage....and we planted strawberries....they made fun of us......

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Oh, Sorry Sir Knightess.. Quite right, quite right. Say, has anyone seen my sword?

justin
I may have no legs, but I do have a stick!

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
And you are floating on an invisible disk!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Why, my orcish friend, you should have planted BEANS!

justin
that's aweful! don't they know how delicious the strawberries are?!

The Knightess
Beans grow tall and strong.

Rabbit Burner
Strawberries! now your talking our kinda language

flyaturtle
:snickers: :covers his mouth: strawberries

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
After we were cast out....We went into a....what is the human word.....a hole?

John D
A Whole What??

Rabbit Burner
no need to start name calling!

The Knightess
Bean are hearty and can warm your belly on a cold night. Beans would have most assuredly been better.

The Knightess
Wait... did you say a hole? The Kolbolds spoke of a hole as well.

Rabbit Burner
Kihightess if you feel offended at being called an a hole I will teach this foul mouthed Orc.

Riley
Hmmm. I heard the Beanslayer was going to be here several hours ago, with scouting reports from the frontier of some new, burrowing menace.
I've waited as long as I can. Hope he didn't get eaten.
[Riley wanders off in search of mead.]

flyaturtle
a...burrow?

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Perhaps he means a spigot?

GrumpyOne
....picturing the killer rabbit scene from the Holy Grail...but with 29 rabbits and one orc...

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
we sought....shelter....it seemed like a good place, hidden from Kobolds and other miscreants of the forest...but then the earth started.....trembling....

The Knightess
[you made me laugh so hard after going back and rereading what i typed]

John D
Sounds like a bender.

Rabbit Burner
30 Dynamite Rabbits

The Knightess
seriously get a room Rabbit... {snicker}

justin
George, you sound really out of breath.... would you like some water? or maybe some food? anything?

GrumpyOne

30? It was 28 then 29 a minute ago...just how fast do you...oh, nevermind...going back to my Pigs Ear Ale.

Rabbit Burner
don't need a room we are rabbits!

flyaturtle
Met a kobold at a tavern once. Ate all my strawberries, the bastard. I feel your pain, Orc.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
we thought it was a dragon approaching...and crawled deeper into the cave....maybe mistake.....the tunnel was round, and it bent this way and that....we decided, well....we have come this far....maybe there is treasure? let's go further in....maybe mistake.....

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
@Tells us, Sir Orc, did you see the source of the trembling earth?

John D
GeorgeOrc, if you lie down for an hour the spins usually go away.
or "Boot and Rally" works for me.

flyaturtle
Do you know how hard it is to transport strawberries all the way out of the Dungeon of Doom without smushing them? Hopping over lava, dodging swinging traps, fighting alligators. I get to the tavern to enjoy my beer and framboise, and the bastard ate em all when I wasn't looking. I hate kobolds.

Rabbit Burner
Give him whatever SigmaOne took he sobered up real quick - what you packing Sigma ?

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Then I saw it....not Orc.....not human.....

The Knightess
What was it Master Orc... um George.

justin
the notorchuman!!!!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
first the terrible sounds....like big.....crickets.....khri, khri, khri......khri, khri, khri.....

Rabbit Burner
oh that sounds like some heavy shit came down Orc

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
I saw.....humans too.....but not normal....pale....like moles.....half mole, half cricket.....

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
I ran.....I ran so far away......

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
I couldn't get away.....

Rabbit Burner
ahh good old plan B

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
(oh wait...that was the 80's)

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
I will take you there! Do you want to come with me?

GrumpyOne
Run Forrest.. run...oh, I meant run through the forest

John D
..half mole, half cricket people?

GeorgeOrc,
I'm thinking detox, my friend.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Sir Orc, Let us go and see what you have seen!

The Knightess
I will go with you GeorgeOrc. count me as a sword for you.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
I can take you there....but burrows run soooooo deep....and they twist and turn.....and sometimes holes open up, and more crickets with sharp blades as arms come at you from all sides! Everyone I know is dead!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
No, Sir Orc, you know us! And we still live!

The Knightess
and I volunteer Master Rabbit and Master Sigma as well. They owe me.

Rabbit Burner
Hey what now!

The Knightess
Can you take us as far as the entrance?

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Hmm. Methinks I hear the Privy Council arguing, must put them to bed. I mean, break tie votes.

Rabbit Burner
Damn just because you devour someone's plate of beans

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
The Knightess giveth (the stick), and the Knightess taketh (the stick) away.

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
It is dangerous out here. Take this! *hands Knightess a one-use teleportation charm.* It can take you and ten others to safety within Valoria.

The Knightess
I think Master Justin has your stick

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
As he speaks...the Orc starts to look strange....pale...less green....the ground starts trembling.....and you start to hear it.....the sound.....Khri, khri, khri.....

Rabbit Burner
oh crap!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
*Sir Sigma pulls out a long dagger* Begins whittling a new quarterstaff.

The Knightess
Why thank you Chancellor. I will keep this safe.
*Sticks it down between the lases of the leather chest plate.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
uh oh!

Rabbit Burner
32 bunnies form a defensive circle

The Knightess
The Knightess spins to face away from the camp towards the sounds.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Ghanash-Kackhu the Orc turns around, and you see his backside has been ripped open! There is a gaping wound.....wait....not a wound.....

John D
Gasp - I'm all out of Croissants!

Laurentas, Baker, Basilisk Str., Valoria
@ John D
No you are not! Here come the supplies!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Khri.....Khri......Khri......

The Knightess
The sound grew louder behind the Knightess from the center of the circle. OH SHIT.

Rabbit Burner
Hold fast bunnies!!!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
*Sir Sigma lifts his staff defensively, prepared to wail on what may not longer be an orc.*

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
His backside......it's not a wound, you see a green scaly "lobster?" something is attached to him! Slimy....the orc that was Ghanash starts to walk stiffly away from the Campfire....toward the beckoning sounds......stiffly walking away.....

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Ummm... should we kill that thing?

Rabbit Burner
if in doubt roll to hit

justin
did everyone else see that? I could just be seeing things... I did loose a lot of blood

Rabbit Burner
That's a yes kill it !!!!

John D
That's putting me right off my strawberries.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
The Sewer Warden whispers......"follow him, quietly....let us follow.....they beckon to him....."

The Knightess
ATTACK!

justin
wait!

The Knightess
The sewage warden grabs the Knightess and shakes his he NO.

justin
oh good... he stopped you

flyaturtle
:hides in his shell: eep!

The Knightess
I trust you Warden, but only for so long. There is something WRONG about letting him leave... I fear we will regret this

Rabbit Burner
What! we are not killing it?

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
He who was Ghanash walks stiffly through the dark forest...nothing stops him...his arms bleed from thorn bushes...the sounds get louder.....

Rabbit Burner
I got a bad feeling about this.

John D
That "middle-eye" thing is bogus - I feel fiiiinn..

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
You come to a hole in the ground! A BURROW!!!!
okay, little dizzy

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
KHRI! KHRI! KHRI!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
All hope is lost....the Khri are upon you! ENJOY!

Rabbit Burner
SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!

Sir Geekjeff, Bean-Knight of Valoria
Ladies and gentleman, the tale we've heard speaks for itself. Our intrepid heroes have apparently been conquered - Doooomed, if you will - by a master race of giant arcane ants. It is difficult to tell if they will consume the imperiled Valorians or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain - there is no stopping them. The Khri, will soon be here.
And I, for one, welcome our new Insect Overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted forum personality I... I could be very helpful in... in rounding up others! To toil in their underground sugar caves.

EPILOGUE
K. Jones (SigmaOne)
@Stefan Thanks! *Sir Sigma begins walking stiffly, a scaly insectoid attached to his back*

justin
might i have my legs back?

The Knightess
In a flash of smoke the group of 10 suriviving brothers in arms finds themselves before the tavern as the rain falls from the sky. The Knightess looks over to the Chancellor. Good call on that teleportation spell. We would have been GONERS.
Looking back towards the dark sky over Thorn Forest... Valoria is in trouble.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Thanks everyone:) That was fun:)

John D
Oh, Hollywood Ending :)
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Rabbit Burner
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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Rabbit Burner » Wed May 02, 2018 9:49 am

Chapter IV – Toast

John D
Oh No - The croissants are Toast!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Nigel, the same.....TOASTED!

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
i just steamrolled a rabbit. "burp!'" That was tasty. Moving on.... another 3 inches.

The Knightess
Sigma... perhaps a little TOO much ale before the adventure

Monty Serpent
Monty Serpent bought it back there. The bottle of mead is fine though if anyone wants it.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Justin gets only have his body behind a tree....he watches his legs melt off....dying....

The Knightess
I got some healing spells... who needs um?

Rabbit Burner
I am watching you Masmorden !

Nigel Blasi
I didn't need hair anyway! Onwards to the borrowers!!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[Sigma waves a flaming stick around, trying to hit the boar, but stumbling wildly.]

justin
I had just showed up "whats all this ruckus AHHHHGHGE!..."

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
everyone else saves and takes 12 HP....

Rabbit Burner
I am singed but otherwise intact sadly the 12 are beyond even your magical sorceries

John D
This is not the picnic I signed up for!

The Knightess
Deep gash on the shoulder, blood all over the uniform, but its mostly the boar... mostly.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
a guy named Mike wanders in from behind a tree....

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
It seems *hic* we have some new recruits!

justin
this is no picnic, this is a BBQ

Angkor Ravenwing

Show yourself, pyromancer! (I try to detect evil)

Rabbit Burner
26 rabbits all chorus 'Hi Mike'

Mike Shea
*slings his two-handed great sword over his fur-covered shoulder* Hail friends..you look....crispy....

Rabbit Burner
That would not be Rabbit fur would it? I ask menacingly
well as menacingly as a two and half foot rabbit can look

justin

had... I'm a gonner

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
my gelatinous body shrivels slightly from the fiery blast. Chunks of corroded armor pieces drop to the forest floor. I shudder but my ravenous appetite for boar flesh drives me onward... another 3 inches.

GrumpyOne
Damn flame singed my Dwarven beard....

The Knightess
The Knightess tosses the chorus another carrot just to watch them fight each other for it.

Mike Shea
*pets a fat rabbit* "Hello there, little friend" *reaches around behind his back for a wooden skewer but thinks better of it "How did you little fellows survive a fireball?"

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
The Sewer Warden greets you Mike! "We are searching for the Burrows! Do you have any family?"

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Rabbit Burner....14 rabbits are toasted:(

Rabbit Burner
some of us didn't
and I am looking at you too Knightess!!!

The Knightess
He started with like 36 i think

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
We shall stand and fall together, as a family! Now.. did anyone see what's happened to my shield? In all the confusion it seems to have slipped my grasp.

Nigel Blasi
Hello mike! Yes i am extra crispy thanks for noticing

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
K. Jones... the shield is now inside my gelatinous mass. "burp!" delish.

Rabbit Burner
No we started with 18 ;)
but you know rabbits!

Mike Shea
"I fear my family all died of cholera, thank you for asking. I too seek the Burrows!"

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
the sun IS setting by now....and you all realize how hungry you are!

The Knightess
What do you know of its treachery? Even the kolbolds sought refuges from the evil that lurks there

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
@K. Jones. You're welcome to reach in a get it. >:D

The Knightess
All eyes look at Rabbit

Rabbit Burner
What? why you all looking at me?
you cant prove a thing! you wont take me alive! see you in court!
delete where applicable

John D
Did anyone see a one-eyed boar around here? I lost sight of it during the roasting.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
@Masmorden I hear there is a certain libation that calls for a few tablespoons of Gelatinous cube jelly in the recipe... helps burn away unhealthy flora in the colon.

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
<8O

Rabbit Burner
Where is Sigma and that stick?

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
@Rabbit I'm here, I'm here... but my stick is still aflame and slowly burning away!

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Sorry all, fresh out of Resurrection diamonds. Valorian coffers a bit light after badger order...

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
You all smell cooked boar.....and rabbit.....and man flesh.....

The Knightess
The Kightess holds up the boars carcass. Right here Master Gargoyle. Lets get this roasting before Master rabbit looses more familly members

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
1.5M stretch goal: bacon.

GrumpyOne
I smell beans.

John D
hmm, that smell, it's............not bad!

Rabbit Burner
27 rabbits all trying to blowout Sigmas flaming stick

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Nothing like a meal of pork and beans after a hard fight!

The Knightess
LOL Sigma

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Fire? Good thing i have this box from my colleague Nathaniel Wolf. He left a river inside for us!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
You all hunker down for some tasty wild boar meat:) As night falls who takes the first watch?

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
I'm good at watching!

John D
These croissants are Perfectly Toasted! Well done!
(shame about Justin and the ~dozen rabbits.....)

Rabbit Burner
I humbly suggest that the Big Ear clan are not relied on to keep watch.
We rabbits tend to get err.... distracted

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
I will take first watch! *Moments later, Sigma begins snoring loudly*

Angkor Ravenwing
I'll watch after @DW

GrumpyOne
I'll help DW. Out here in the woods...ain't the place for a dwarf to be. Can't sleep anyway....would be better off underground.

Mike Shea
"I will take first watch!"

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
@Randy but your roasted zombie corpse can!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Whoa...another wanderer is spotted peering from behind a tree! Must be the fireball blast attracting.....hikers....

Lee Auter
Oh, lol. Cool, but I'll pass. Busy night ahead for me just checking if there was any info on burrows yet

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
the hiker runs away....

Rabbit Burner
He probably thought SigmaOne's snoring was another boar attack

The Knightess
The Knightess needs to patch herself up as she hit the boar first. Got a few wounds that need bound, and this board blood is kinda sticky.

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
I find a nice, inconspicuous spot further up on the trail and wait for my next meal.

John D
Ask the Hiker for directions!
oh..too late.

GrumpyOne
Hey...move along hiker, Naked Hiking Day was June 21st, not the 24th.

The Knightess
Want some beans? Knightess holds up a bowl offering to share.

justin
I would like to heal my melted legs..... perhaps I can put some sticks in there to help with the walking issues

Rabbit Burner
Big mistake Knightess - 28 rabbits descend on her proffered bowl

The Knightess
The Knightess tosses Master Justin a slightly burned stick that smells like roast carrots. "Don't ask"

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
I create a disc of shimmering force to carry our legless luckless friends.

The Knightess
The Knightess drops the bowl to the ground to allow the rabbits to fight over. Walked over to the watch.
"Anything moving out there?"

Mike Shea
"mmm? Nope?"

The Knightess
Knightess shakes her head. That's not right though. There should be all types of night sounds. Owls, racoons, bats. something. Something lurks here that is not right.
Mythrassian Lagomorph Hivemind Minion of the Flaming Bunny Clan

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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Rabbit Burner » Tue Apr 24, 2018 7:02 am

Chapter III – Into the Unknown

Rabbit Burner
Nom nom nom ... thank Knightess ..nom nom ... I never believed all those stories about you.

The Knightess
You should.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
And so, the captain of the guard sounds the horns as you head out of the Gates following the narrow path towards the edge of the lake. many eyes look down from the walls of the city...forlorn looks...there is not great optimism...some make signs to their gods, as they see your rugged group off....

Rabbit Burner
To me Flaming Bunnies of the Big Ears clan we go to reclaim the burrow of our forefathers forefathers forefathers forefathers...... well you get the picture.

Monty Serpent
Aarghhh we're still a group...not a mob? I thought we were a mob...!

Rabbit Burner
Well given that there are remarkably more bunnies in the Big Ears clan of the Flaming bunnies I think we can claim mob status

Lughtegern
mob is kangaroos, what about a litter

Sir Geekjeff, Bean-Knight of Valoria
It's not the size of the mob that matters...

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
I've always worried i was the only privy councilor... This that makes me Chancellor!

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
To the forest!

Elye Alexander
Methinks I will keep watch on this expedition from high above, astride my griffin. All the better to beat a hasty... er, to scout ahead, and return to warn the city should disaster befall. (Though given the heroes involved, what could possibly go wrong?)

Rabbit Burner
c'mon adventures lets stay on target or this town is going to have a rabbit problem!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
You follow in single file...the Sewer Warden in front....the lake to your right...marching along a single path....and then....the stench! The cantrip has worn off? or perhaps nothing can truly keep that smell completely away? Arrrrgh! You steel yourselves against the smell of your guide....finding relief every now and then from the breeze coming in from the lake....by mid-day you have reached the edge of the forest!

The Knightess
The road to the east is smooth and worn over time with rivets from wagon wheels, and footsteps. But at the branch that breaks off towards the deepwoods in Thorn Forest, the road is noticable rougher. not many have ventured this way. The sky is almost black over Thorn Forest, and a crack of thunder shatters the conversation of the mob mentality. The deepwood beckons.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[stepping out of a privy into an alley just off the city square]
Aay? Wher'd e'rybody go?! [cinching sword belt]

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
The Knightess means the road to the north is well paved;)

Lughtegern
Ummm, Alas I must leave, err,I seem to remember I didn't finish my ale... got a litter to attend to...umm good luck.......

The Knightess
The Knightess has been drinking some of Master Sigma's ale. East, North... same thing. its one foot in front of the other.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Oh Gosh, yes....the thunder can be heard....the skies are darkening fast.....your guide pulls on his worn leather hood...

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[walking along the road] Those shcoundrels think ther gonna take all *hic* my gold?! I'll show 'em. I get there and show 'em how to swing a sword... [groaning] oh, my head... where's my ale? Was that a rat just zoomed across my path, back to the city?

Rabbit Burner
Fortunately due to the massive carrot consumption us of the Flaming Bunnies are not affected by the dark ...WHAT IS THAT SMELL!!!!!!

John D
the wind shifts, a strong gust right to the nostrils! (gackk)

The Knightess
Lord of Rats you will be missed, but at least this time, the tunnels will be well lit when we venture forth

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
Ooooh... a stinky dark forest! The wikia master will be pleased!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
nooo...shoot the deserter!

Rabbit Burner
the sound of 30 rabbits gagging is drowned out by the thunder

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
At the edge of the forest, as it starts to rain....what do you do? Do you head inside for shelter?

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
Rain? Shelter? Been wet before... lead us on!

The Knightess
Head into the forest, dragging Master Sigma close behind

Rabbit Burner
please oh mighty Zaltar can you not re conjure the cantrip that neutralises that foulest of odours ?

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
You hear the sounds of raindrops as you file into the dark path....the smell of pine needles now relieves your senses, helping to mask the smell of your guide....the forest sounds strangely quiet though....

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Ugh.. that smell! That's not me, is it?

Monty Serpent
Yea, sure it'll be safe in the forest. Nice n dry

Rabbit Burner
ahh the pleasant rain doth take away that rancid smell

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Friends! Perhaps we should pause and have a quaff.. and maybe a bit of nap before we swing our swords, here under the pines on a soft needle bed, away from the rain...

Rabbit Burner
32 twitching noses can now sense the wrongness that is in this forest

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Suddenly from the left side towards the back something comes CRASHING out of the underbrush!! Everybody roll a 10 sided for initiative!!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Er... maybe now is not the time for a nap after all.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
(no cheating!)

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
(Zaltar knows all....)

John D
Oh no........a "1".

Monty Serpent
1

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
7

rustythorn, swordsman of Valoria
pi

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
I rolled a 3.

Nigel Blasi
5!

The Knightess
F me - 1

GrumpyOne
2

Angkor Ravenwing
5

Rabbit Burner
I rolled a 1
seven 3's
four 4 s
five 7's
ten 8's
five 10's
and one fell of the side of the table and chased by the cat

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Knightess has those fast reflexes! Before anyone could notice the wild boar, she reacts first!

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
LOL @Rabbit Burner

Frank, Bearward of Valoria
I, nor the bears, have a die available.

The Knightess
{@ rabbit - LMA}

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
what is your action Knightess? roll a 20 if you attack and describe!

DWM Kickstarter
I head for the nearest tree and attempt to climb!!!

The Knightess
Swords lashes fast and dagger sinks deep. the blood of the boar is seriously not going to come out in the wash.

The Knightess
14 - she will attack with dagger in one hand as sword in other

Rabbit Burner
33 Rabbits scatter leaving their hapless leader stranded (guess whose dice is now cat food)

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
The Boar is wounded but not dead!

John D
I didn't bring any weapons - Just croissants!
(thought this was a picnic...)

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
who goes on 1?

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
Bacon and loin of pork will pair nicely with croissants, methinks!

The Knightess
Chancellor!!! where are you! Boar is gouging things that shouldn't be gouged

The Knightess
Monty and Rabbit both have 1s

Rabbit Burner
Knightess is that the Boar that stole the carrot on the stick ?

The Knightess
Grumpy is 2, Jones is 3
Angkor and Nigel are 5

The Knightess
Yes Rabbit, indeed it is.

The Knightess
It is an evil boar that stole the carrot right off the stick that i handed Master Sigma

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Monty hesitates....he gets mauled! The Boar chews his ankle for 6 HP.....

Rabbit Burner
RIGHT! you Boar are gonna ave it!
no one steals from the Flaming Bunnies Big Ears Clan !!!

Monty Serpent
For my action, I'm quietly contemplating the chaos of the situation. Plus, I snaffled a bottle of mead from the inn so thinking about opening that.

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[Not waiting his turn in iniative order, Sir Sigma of the One draws his broadsword, only to find someone has replaced his broadsword with a stick!] Wha?! [Swinging the stick against the boar, rolling a 9] Take that low beast! You shall be joining us as supper this evening!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Grumpy...roll a 20!

John D
Don't worry, I'll protect the croissants with my life if need be!
(well, probably not - but it sounds good)

Monty Serpent
Youch! My mead!

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
K. Jones distracts the boar!

Rabbit Burner
Rabbit dashes between the boars legs looking to get behind the stealing bastard - (having been successful with my procreation save)

Monty Serpent
Yikes that's not mead...it's my lifeblood draining away...Yurk.

Nigel Blasi
FIREBALL!

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
I ready my dagger to poke at the boar! Rolling a... 16... when its my turn.

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Ankor and Nigel, what do you do? Now is the time for action! Roll a 20 sided!

Rabbit Burner
Bollocks failed my dex check for a sneaky backstab (bear with me its been a long time since I done this)

Nigel Blasi
12.. I draw an arrow from my quiver and loose it at the boar

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Randy you stab the boar in the shank! It's almost dead!

Rabbit Burner
Now its a proper DnD session now Fireball has been cast !
Hey wait a minute I am right behind the Boar!!

John D
I could jog back to town for some mustard, lettuce, ...anyone need sandwich fixings?

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
I slowly creep my gelatinous matter closer to the boar in a flanking maneuver.

The Knightess
The Knightess tackles Rabbit as the Fireball soars past

Frank, Bearward of Valoria
A five! We retroactively rolled a five!

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
*Runs to join the group* Hmph. Buying garb befitting my new title took longer than expected.
Initiative: 3
Children to feed dinner to: 2

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
I am now 3 inches closer...

DW, Chancellor of Valoria
Next chance I get I cast forth protective magics about the party.

Rabbit Burner
Thanks Knightess - people will begin to talk if we keep meeting like this

The Knightess
Masmorden watch out for the FireBall!

The Knightess
Master Rabbit, would you rather be Roast Rabbit?

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
12 hits! Nigel shoots the boar right through the left eye! a pea like shape shoots into the forest, miraculously avoiding trees and striking one in the distance....there is a low roar of an explosion....FIREBALL! There is chaos as everybody dives behind trees or to the ground! Everybody roll a die 20 for saving throws!!!

Sir Geekjeff, Bean-Knight of Valoria
@Rabbit better change your name to Rabbit Burnee

Rabbit Burner
It would be a mere flesh wound - I did say thanks and to be fair I did mean it.

Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
does an 8 save?

The Knightess
16

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
Thanks Knightess, but I'm a good 23 feet or so out... I should be able to attack by Tuesday.

Angkor Ravenwing
ST 12

justin
if it does, does a seven also save?

Nigel Blasi
8..

Masmorden, Gelatinous Cube of Valoria
14

John D
I'm a gargoyle made of Enchanted Stone - Fire's no problem (Ice is tricky, tho).

GrumpyOne
17!!

Rabbit Burner
let me summarise:
I survived :)
but 12 Rabbits died in the fiery holocaust - may their teeth gnaw forever on the carrot of the after garden of the gods
leaving 24 of the Big Ear clan left

K. Jones (SigmaOne)
[Master Sigma rolls 2 for his saving throw :-/ ]

Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
Randy, the archivist gets caught flat footed...you all watch as his hair is blown backwards by the force of the fireball and his flesh is also torn from his bones.....ack! fried alive!
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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Rabbit Burner » Tue Apr 24, 2018 5:41 am

Spiropolous the Minotaur wrote:
Mon Apr 23, 2018 12:28 pm
Thank you for saving that Rabbit Burner! That was fun:) And yes, totally impromptu....perhaps we shall do it again in July!
The most fun I have had backing a KS - bravo sir
Made KSV such a fabulous experience

And yes you should do it again in July :)
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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Spiropolous the Minotaur » Mon Apr 23, 2018 12:28 pm

Thank you for saving that Rabbit Burner! That was fun:) And yes, totally impromptu....perhaps we shall do it again in July!

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Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

Post by Rabbit Burner » Thu Apr 12, 2018 11:03 am

    CHAPTER II - Refugees

    The Knightess
    Onward intrepid adventurers. we need to make our way east towards where the road branches into the Thorn wood. Grab your ale, we can drink and sign on the way. but once we hit the wood or tunnels, silence will be on our side.
    My Lord, do you plan to travel with us to the edge of the city?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    As you sit at the Gold Coin Inn you hear a commotion outside from Roaring Lion square...some sort of ruckus....the horns of the City sound off!

    Rabbit Burner
    No coin is need for our services just some of those delicious pointy orange root vegetables is all we require, that and the opportunity to reclaim our lost kingdom that we have only just decided was ours in the time of legend and Battle Bunnies!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    I will indeed travel with you as a humble servant of the crown:) Come let's see what hails outside by the gates!

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    *Ouch* I think shomeone put the blade on the wrong end of my shword again! Now who . *hic* .. who shtole my helm!
    Aye, Knightesh .. ish ohnly fittin tha I take lead. Many yearsh I ha*uuurp*--ave fightin dark thingsh!

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    Let's go check out the ruckus!

    The Knightess
    Don't worry Master Sigma, I got your back, sir.

    Lughtegern
    I'll send my mouse familiars into the streets to scout ahead

    Dan
    so very glad i have a cat familiar, so much safer...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    As you exit the gold Coin Inn you see towards the gates of town a score of Valorian guardsmen looking out over the walls, you look to step into the street when behind you there is shouting and you all press yourselves against the walls of the building just in time as peasants scatter all around you, there is a great thundering as some mailed Knights of the crown, armor shining in the sunlight, reflecting and blinding you as you look up at them, rush past you...horns are blaring...there is great confusion, some are running from the gate, commoners, and others clad in steel, are going to defend the gates!

    Jim Slawnikowski
    My word! What could possibly be the matter?!

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    Shall we go to the gates to find out?

    Dan
    probably a mob wanting beans assaulting the gate

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Sensing a need for reinforcements, I focus my will and bring forth spirits of stone to inhabit the savage gargoyles about us. Lend us your aid spirits and march with Sigma!

    Monty Serpent
    I'm wanting to practice bardic music by mime so I'm quiet in the burrows.

    Lughtegern
    ummm maybe it's time for the sewers, now where was that grate....

    The Knightess
    Chancellor, lets go look and see if we should be concerned about this interuption,
    Perhaps the sluice masons might know another way out of the city if we need to avoid the gates.
    Unless whatever perils the Thorn forest has made its ways to our gates. Arm yourself my brothers.

    The Knightess
    Master of Rats might also know the quickest way to our destination

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Hark Bean-Knight, what news from the gates? Thin rations thinning your courage?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    As you rally your company and head to the gates, there is a grating sound to your left....a grill to the sewers is lifting off!

    The Knightess
    Master Knight, The beans may have gone the way of the animals and birds within the Thorn Forest. Something stalks this kingdom and portends evil

    Lughtegern
    ah there's the grate i was looking for....maybe its time to go back to the inn....

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Behold! A terrible smell!

    Rabbit Burner
    Fear not the Big Ears lodge will stand firm, though you have to understand our base urges come to the fore at the most inconvenient times

    The Knightess
    The Lord of Rats is calling his cousins, and cousins, and cousins. They will aid us, I am sure.

    Greyanvil, Hammer of Moradin
    Tag Greyanvil, Hammer of Moradin, fighting paladin of the Soul Forger, grabs his cold iron war hammer in his scarred, calloused hands and with a thundering shout of "Moradin!" charges out of the inn and towards the sounds of chaos.....

    Rabbit Burner
    Mistress Knightess there are enough animals within our party to completely repopulate the forest

    The Knightess
    LMAO Rabbit. that is soooo true.

    Monty Serpent
    I'm not sure

    The Knightess
    Master Rabbit, I have a carrot here. I have no clue why it is attached to this here stick. But it is yours if you can grab it.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    climbing out of the grill...perhaps disturbed by the thunderous hooves of the Valorian calvary is a man covered in a slick leathery coat...upon his back is a long heavy shovel....

    Rabbit Burner
    oo oo gimme gimme ..... hey why is it never getting closer ... that bloody gate is though

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Does said man have a proud single stripe of hair from front to back? Could it be? May we be so lucky???

    Monty Serpent
    Could be Privy. I mean, we're all feelin lucky this blessed night aren't we?

    The Knightess
    Unfortunately the Bean-Slayer has not been spotted for a fortnight. His swords would be welcome.
    Most Welcome Indeed.

    Rabbit Burner
    so would that damned carrot - don't think I don't know what your doing Knightess!! but I am not going any where near that gate - (once again passes his procreate saving throw)

    Monty Serpent
    Maybe he's already waiting for us at the burrows with his lens of razor sharp images...

    The Knightess
    Slipping through the growing crowd at the gate, the shouting grows, torches flickering their light as the sky has darkened with the resurging threat of rain.

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    Auugghhh... me thinks there ought to be a way to send some of that rain to the mythical lands of missouri...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Ahhh...the stench...the man climbs fully out and carefully, meticulously, closes the cover. It's a Sanitation man! A Royal Sluice Warden! You have heard tales of their prowess...masons of the undercity, prepared to combat all sorts of forsaken smelly abominations that lurk beneath the streets day and night. He turns to your group and locks steely eyes upon the Privy Councilor...."Sir, are you in need of my shovel?"

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Are we to take down that raucous crowd at tha gate, then?! Shall we charge an lay a waste to the rabble who be caushing all thish trouble?

    Rabbit Burner
    Holy bunny hell! what in Watership Down is that SMELL!!!!!

    The Knightess
    There waw no information passed back to the crowd by the soldiers, so the only acceptable thing was to saddle up towards one very recognizable guard. Coins were passed with subtle nods. Information was just as important as brave souls, and foolish swords.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    quickly someone, a cantrip....remove smell....

    Monty Serpent
    Are we a mob yet? How many do we need for mob status?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    You see a throng of kobolds beyond the gates!

    Angkor Ravenwing
    I would like to help you, but first I have to find McCauchar Party �

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Archers at the top of the walls are aiming but NOT firing....there seems to be a calm....

    Rabbit Burner
    Has the smell gone yet? my olfactory senses shut down.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    an old woman, a crony across the street opens the window shutters and looks towards the gate, squinting....

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    I salute the Royal Sluice Warden, carefully casting a subtle but delightfully lemony cleansing spell on him and summon him to aid us!

    The Knightess
    Master Rabbit, Master Sigma has a cure for that smell, but it may burn your throat something fierce going down.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    The Mason speaks: "Come Knightess, let us investigate all this ruckess....let us all go forth...

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Perhaps these kobolds are of the Bauer clan? Civilized as any in the lands.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Ahhh....the lemony smell is much of an improvement....

    Sir Geekjeff, Bean-Knight of Valoria
    @DW so long as they are not protégés of that Tucker bastard.

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Ah ish a sacred poshion. It burnsh away all impurities and evelates tha mood tuh boot! Drink all, drink before tha battle! It's a special kale an' vokka mix today me bruthers and shishters!

    Rabbit Burner
    Awww Rabbit poo... I ... er.... just give me a minute will you .... I .... err..... hops off around the corner (damn failed my procreate saving throw)

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    It tashtes like ashid an' burnsh like lava! But it puts a glint in yer eyes, and make yeh immortal fer a time!

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    @Geekjeff - Tucker the Most Noble and High of Kobolds? We should be so lucky! The deeds he has wrought in defense of our fair city beneath the noses of the high-browed low-minded...
    He's a terrific subcontractor. Top notch. Privy Councils up and down the coast make use of his services.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    As you approach the gates you see about 20 Kobolds kneeling in front of the gate with their arms laid down on the ground....they seem to be....surrendering? The captain of the guard is looking around, a large gruff man...he spots your group...."Does any of you damn folks speak Kobold?!"

    Rabbit Burner
    Right that's that taken care off! now where is that juicy carrot? scans the crowded square ...oh yeah over there by the bloody gate .... great

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    @Laurentas - There are silver shells on offer to serve the city. Join us and profit!

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Yip yip, yap, snarg, yip yip! Tucker! Bauer! Zaltar! Yip. Yap yip srang.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Doesn't ANYONE Speak Kobold??

    Rabbit Burner
    They can do whatever they like but that orange cone of vegetable goodness is MINE!

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Yip? Yip yip ysarng?
    Hmm. It seems that they wish to shelter within the walls from a terror emerging from the forest. Also something about whether we've seen any flying goats come this way.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Privy, the captain of the guard turns to you...."Ahhh...very good! A linguist! Shelter you say?"

    GrumpyOne
    Nub gruk (no understand)

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    many of the guardsmen look amused...they are fierce men and a few women as well...the captain calls to the gatehouse "raise the gates!" We got......"Refugees!"

    Rabbit Burner
    yeah lets open the gates and let the Kobolds in what could possibly go wrong, FFS Knightess stop waving that stick.

    The Knightess
    Turning towards the Chancellor. "Since when do you speak Kolbold?" I thought you Failed that class?

    Elye Alexander
    Might I suggest they shelter in Orc Town, my lord? Our sturdy half-orc citizens will keep them in line should there be any...rambunctiousness.

    The Knightess
    "What stick Master Rabbit?" shifts arm again. "Don't have a clue what you're talking about."

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Uggh Tha Kohbalds 'r attackin'! They be at the gates! We musht kill 'em all! Quick whil *hiccu* while they dropped ther weapons!!

    The Knightess
    After receiving silence and a wink from the Chancellor, "A wonderful idea to send them with our rather large and intimidating Orc citizens."

    The Knightess
    It's okay Master Sigma. Here hold this stick... and don't let Master Rabbit reach you or he might steal your cup of ale.

    Elye Alexander
    ...Though, 'twere wise to learn what the kobolds know (if anything) about the threat in the forest *before* they get their scaly little hands on any orcish liquor.

    Rabbit Burner
    I'm with SigmaOne the only good Kobold is a dead one! You know they have been known to eat rabbits the cold hearted bastards!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    The Kobolds are rather frail looking...3ft tall...with reddish, brownish bumpy hide for skin...yet their eyes look fairly intelligent, unlike some lizard men you have seen from time to time...these ones look around with eyes of wonder at the City of Valoria...they seem, almost like children....

    Rabbit Burner
    Noooo ... Knightess a Rabbit can go off people you know.

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Wha!? Did someone shay Lizzhard Men!? Where? To arms! I'll hold thish stick! Wha .. wher'd I get this shtick anywayss? Who needs a quaff of good ol' burning courage? I got a flask righ.. right here.. somewhere, now where is that?

    Rabbit Burner
    Children shmildren burn the rabbit eating monsters!!!!

    Monty Serpent
    This could be a Monty Python sketch...love it...

    CrimsonKingOfTheTower Valorian Knight
    I want a pet kobold aw

    Lughtegern
    Ahh pythons now, watch out my dear mice!

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Mm... did shomebody say rabbit eating? Are we havin' Hasenpfeffer for dinner? Wha's in the ole stew pot? Belly ish a rumbling

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Methinks the rabbit has been in the sun too long. I shall see the kobolds safely placed.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    As the come out of the dark tunnel of the gatehouse there is some jeering from the guards above..."yip, yip" they make fun of the dog like yelps we all know Kobolds to make....they huddle together, as a tall guardsman with a halberd sweeps them along towards Lion's Lane...towards Castle Crag...

    Rabbit Burner
    Bollocks! failed again hurriedly looking round for a likely partner, shit where are the rest of the Big Ears lodge I cry ..... with the urge now irresistible I go for the nearest target ... don't worry Sigma it will be all over in the shake of a rabbits tale.

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    (have i been promoted to Chancellor? Who is the Chancellor???)

    The Knightess
    DW I thought you were the chancellor of the privy council. like head council member. did I make that up in my head? sorry

    Riley
    The other privy.

    Lughtegern
    What is driving these refugees? We should investigate! (the mouse lord sends some mice beyond the gates into yonder woods, ostensibly to avoid monties pythons)

    Rabbit Burner
    Feeling the eyes of Kobolds on me as I excise the demon seed on Sigma 'wot you looking at?! go on move along nothing .... to ....see

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    The lead Kobold turns to the Councilor...."yip,yip, errrrr,er.....yip, grrrr" translation: doom coming to you all....30 minutes more"

    Monty Serpent
    Now where are those mice?

    Lughtegern
    aakkk!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    The Sewer Warden beckons to The Privy...."come, I know a path into the forest...my eldest is a Ranger you know....takes me on walks into the forest on my days off....I can at least lead you to the edge of the woods?"

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    Heeey... anybody got a reschipe fer kobold liver cakes? fried ko *hic* uh.. kobold ears? Whersh tha seashoning ssalt?

    The Knightess
    Why wait for it to come to us, My Lord. I will take these mighty warriors (motions to the montly crew assorted behind the gate soldiers). Lets take our combined strength to the Doom and head off the danger, keeping from our dear Valorian citizens. The city must be protected at all costs. To Arms, my Brothers?
    .
    The Knightess raises a fist to the crowd.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Yes! To the Forest!

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    Onward! To the forest!

    Rabbit Burner
    sad at the lack of carrot in the fist but a pledge is a pledge 'yes to the forest'

    Lughtegern
    Squeek! Bloody owls, just lost another one...

    The Knightess
    Pulls a slightly broken carrot out of her pocket and hands it to Master Rabbit. "A promise is a promise, old friend"
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    Re: The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

    Post by Rabbit Burner » Wed Apr 04, 2018 7:18 am

    • CHAPTER I - The Gathering
    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    South East of the fabled City of Valoria past Mt. Uruth and the Kobolds that bow to the green Dragon, mistress of the Tangles... there is a place spoken about in hushed tones only after many pints of Ale quaffed down in the smoky back rooms of the Sea Wolf....Old weathered cronies, spent Rangers, with skin like old shriveled parchment tell tales of burrowed tunnels catacombing the forest floor and winding upward in the hills and mountains there...nobody who goes into these tunnels ever returns, least not in the same form....retired Rangers turn pale and glassy eyed with remembrance of these dark burrows and they warn that an evil grows there slowly winding its way underground and that one day, perhaps soon, it may even reach under the walls of Valoria...beware they warn, of the Khri, and the scratching doom forever coming closer and closer...they whisper this through parched lips and with their last heaving breaths into the ears of old wives and priests....

    The Knightess

    STEFAN!!!!!

    Nathaniel D Wolf, Guardsman of Valoria
    good morning Stefan. awesome opener

    The Knightess
    But I want to know what STEFAN knows about the KHRI...
    Tell me more Fearless Leader...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    My Lord, there are reports of strange creatures sighted within the forests....the Kobolds are fleeing the region...it is said the ground trembles....

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Ori the dwarf claims to have explored one of these.....burrows....said he spotted what he thought were farmers, villagers...but they were strange...ghoulish even....and then something big and altogether not human came at him through the tunnel, along the ceiling...he escaped with his own skin....barely!

    Tiom
    Burrows yeah yeah ... I would be ready ;)

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    @Tiom, that's what they a
    ll say.....those who now lie in shallow graves...or buried in collapsed....burrows....

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    At first, we didn't know what was happening....sheep gone missing, cattle, and then farmers, children....was there a wolf about? And then the reports came in.... from weary travelers...wide eyed adventurers or stoic elves with riddles on their thin lips...some of the wild tales were laughable, except we did not....for we had all lost some that were dear to us...

    Elye Alexander
    Hail, King Meleagrance!
    As I was soaring on my griffin high above that part of the great Thorn Forest the rangers know as "The Tangles," I spied movement far below. Swooping lower, I observed a long line of creatures moving furtively through the thorny thickets.
    My mount Evarra, far keener-eyed than I, grew restive; I could sense that whatever she saw disturbed her deeply. Yet I urged her still closer to the treetops.
    I thought, perhaps, what I saw was a column of prisoners or slaves of some kind, human or human-shaped, but driven by inhuman captors, things of a shape I have before seen only in far smaller creatures. But as we drew near one among them seemed to give a signal, and in a matter of moments all disappeared--methinks into some cave or burrow hidden under the spreading branches.
    I fear what this portends.

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Five by five we arranged cups of water to locate the stir beneath. All trembled to their own tunes. This was not a threat the druid circle could contain alone. Swiftly then our riders outward sent seeking allies and friends, summoning horns held desperately to their lips.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    There are murmuring's within the City walls, the citizens of Valoria are restless my lord!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    The Council has dispatched riders to the great Dwarven Cities of Dor-Brael, Dor-Kaelum, and Dor -Kurathael to seek guidance and wisdom from the old fathers there...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    If it is underground surely the dwarves of old will have some expertise or some remembrance? Perhaps there is nothing to worry about, still you never know...perhaps there is some deep worm which is awakening and growing restless? Scouts must be sent for the safety of the city...perhaps we should consult the Gnomes or the nearby Fey? Our hold on the lands should not be taken for granted, it has only been 300 years since we carved out our dominance of this region....never forget the fall of Valor, and the long ages of darkness!

    Elye Alexander
    Sir Trajian of the Valorian Lions brings a report of kobolds from the Tangles clamoring at the doors of a hamlet on the forest edge, begging for aid and shelter. If it came from a less reliable source, I could scarcely believe it. What is it that they fear?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Ori has taken sick...a strange malady....he was rushed to the Temple of Phosaidon near dockside....

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Nathaniel, I am not sure which is worse...this growing fear from the forests to the east or the strange rumors of a new snake cult hidden somewhere beneath this very City! "I don't believe it was snakes me-lord" well, it might as well be, some sort of reptilian or scaly cult I am sure! They always are! Why do the scum of this city always seem to favor reptiles for their evil doings?! " "well, me-lord, it's not always reptiles, if I recall correctly it was undead seeping out from the cemetery on a nightly basis this past moon cycle" ahhh, yes Nathaniel, what dark times we live in! What is to befall us? Will Valoria stand? Or will some heroes rise out of it's filthy streets and Grim Town huts to save us from ourselves?

    The Knightess
    My Lord, my Lord, the villages on the outskirts of Valoria are reporting a lack of animals within the woods, all game have vanished, even the birds have halted their song. There is only hint of buzzing on the aire, but locus are not to be seen... should we send scouts or a party to investigate?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Knightess, collect some local City Elves and send an ambassadorship to the forest, if anyone can tell us what is amiss surely it would be the gentle folk of the woods...do not tary...

    The Knightess
    Aye my Lord, you have my sword whenever called upon. I will begin to collect a party to investigate immediately.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Zaltar? Surely you don't mean that skulking scoundrel who's lights we see at night up in his tower? Why he should be apprehended not called upon! How they let him walk around and tend to his Catacombs unmolested is beyond me?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Knightess, one more thing. choose those without families...

    The Knightess
    Understood my lord. understood. But we can't be too forthcoming with that information or I may find no souls brave enough to travel forth.

    The Knightess
    Might there be some brave men and women who would be interested in joining my expedition. I cannot guarantee your safety or your life.

    Lughtegern
    As the Lord of mice I have no fear of mere tunnels...... Bring them on!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Knightess, What? Why Valoria is never lacking in at least one thing, and that is Brave Souls! Why venture forth down to the docks to the Sea Wolf or Red Beards Tavern and ye shall find many a fool har.....er I mean brave soul to go forth with reckle....er uh great Valor to serve the greater City of Valoria! 10 gold lions to any who might follow you on this foo....uh grand crusade to weed out whatever is ailing the forlorn woods to the east! Now go forth with all the blessings of Phosaidon and Azena!

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    I shall offer my strong arm and fell powers to aid your cause Knightess! Nothing to do until the Dire Badgers arrive anyhow.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    10 Gold Lions to the Privy Councilor!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Unfortunately there have been no Dire honey badgers since before the founding of Valor some 3000 years ago....they were the guardians of Attok, who some say was driven to madness and his badgers as well...some even say that they sleep, in caves far beneath the city, waiting for Attok's return!

    The Knightess
    Of course, Master Lughtegern, the Lord of Mice is always welcome on my travels. After our last debacle, um adventure, I would be a fool to turn your assistance down. Though this time... can we actually light the tunnels we explore?
    .
    I have only heard of the fierceness of the the Sluice Masons. It would be an honor to work with your brethren.
    .
    Master Chancellor, did your Privy council really feel that they needed the Badgers instead of the weasels? That does not bode well for our future.
    Who else is willing to travel to the Forest of Thorns...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    But those tales, the history of Mythras are in a tome kept in the bowels of the Castle...

    The Knightess
    The rain has slowed, but the sky is still too dark for my comfort over towards the Deepwoods...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    By Sluice Masons you mean the Sanitation men? The sewer sloshers? Gosh, who else might we corral into this mis-adventure....woe be my great City of Valoria....these are Dire times indeed.....

    Monty Serpent
    I'll go to the burrows, if someone will show the way...

    DW, Chancellor of Valoria
    Mayhaps we should wait until night fall and our fine Panther. Fueled by the finest dwarven distillates his anger is only matched by his ferocity!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Another fo....I mean hero! 10 silver shells for Sir John!

    Monty Serpent
    I can play bardic music to fit the mood. Will my Harp of Glastonbury Festival +2 fit into the burrows?

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    oh no Sir John, leave your Harp at home! We must be quiet, and cannot disturb the tunnels lest they cave in!

    Smeg
    "Hey, where are the burrows at?" - Sheriff Bart

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    So you shall join us Sherrif?

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    Pick me! Pick me!

    Dan
    Ah... does Valoria need the aid of a Wizard? let me gather my gear, then....

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    10 silver shells for the Archivist! After all somebody must do the mapping!

    Monty Serpent
    Is there chance for a drink at the inn before we head off to certain doo... I mean fame and glory...

    GrumpyOne
    Take a detachment from the Lion Guard and one from the Royal Sluice Masons (but send the fodder collected from the bars and brothels out first to take out any trip wires...).

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    10 silvers for "Dan" the....uh wizard then! And no fireballs in tight tunnels!

    Dan
    oh, i haven't dropped a fireball in a narrow passage in decades! so many worse things to do to ones enemies after all.

    rustythorn, swordsman of Valoria
    my sword is not as sharp as it used to be, but i'm happy to lend offer it

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Good idea sir John! On our way to Lion square we shall stop at the Gold Coin Inn for some Ale and to boast of our impending doo....er Glory!

    Monty Serpent
    How come the Privy Councilor gets paid 10 Gold Lions whereas we're all on silver? What's he privy to? Lol

    K. Jones (SigmaOne)
    I'll *hic* .. I'll lend my sschword .. Now, where ish it? I'll fight off .. *bluurp* .. eh, huchh, I'll fight off whaever.. whatever.. oh, hold on now, whersh my ale? My tankard? whatever dares threaten our f-fine Val*hicc*laloria! Now, where did I leave my shcabbard? Who took it? Ish that my shield? *THUNK*... is that an eartquake? I think the earth ish shpinning.

    Sir Geekjeff, Bean-Knight of Valoria
    John Battle why not do both at the same time?
    We'll bring our fiery brews of liquid courage AND blast whatever foul beasties we find clean outta their tunnels!
    Dwarven Alechemist Society, reporting for duty! Bottoms up!

    Randy, Jr. Archivist of Valoria
    TEN silver shells!!!! Woooo!!!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Rustythorn, fear not! Any sword shall do! 10 silver shells to you! We shall put you in front to....scout:)

    Jim Slawnikowski
    The Bardish Half-Elf steps up to the table. I would love to tag along to help document this adventure. I sing one hell of a ballad.

    Monty Serpent
    Jim hush we got to be sneaky quiet in those burrows...

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    @John, Councilors get paid in Lions!

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Gosh! Another Bard! What kind of Merry City is this??

    Rabbit Burner
    Although there is reluctance on behalf of our clan long tooths, the Big Ears lodge of the Flaming Bunnies are your to command if it means the cleansing of those thrice benighted burrows

    Lughtegern
    Mice are happy with shells and all leavings.....

    The Knightess
    Master Sigma, You are a wonderful leader, we will follow you into whatever doom may come. We will be right behind you protecting your flank and rear. Bring the ale mug, no need to sober up.

    Stefan Pokorny, Zaltar of Valoria
    Flaming Bunnies? Flaming Bunnies? WHY NOT! 10 coppers :)

    Stay tuned for chapter II - coming soon or when we can be bothered to forum format it - which ever is later!
    Mythrassian Lagomorph Hivemind Minion of the Flaming Bunny Clan

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    The great Burrows Reveal RPG session - KSV comments

    Post by Rabbit Burner » Wed Apr 04, 2018 5:50 am

    So leading up to the great Burrows reveal Stefan started an impromptu RPG session which took a little time to get going as it took time for the backers to catch on.

    But with help from The Kightess and Elye the adventure started moving forward (kicking and screaming) as backers cottoned on and started joining in.

    The result was a shed load of fun - the most fun I have had on a comments section (ok maybe that's not selling it).

    Once it finished and the Burrows were revealed someone suggested the adventure should be saved - so we did :) all 108 pages of it!

    With some judicial edits and formatting it is now down to 28 pages. We also changed the order of some posts to make it read better.

    Apologies if we have edited too much or not enough - pretty happy with what is left :)

    We have split it up into chapters to avoid a great wall of text.

    Hopefully you will get a flavour of what happened and maybe a smile or two at the bad and mostly immature jokes that abounded ........

    EDIT - turns out it needs more formatting as chapter one did not look good when just pasted in as a forum post, so give us a little time to sort it ;)
    Mythrassian Lagomorph Hivemind Minion of the Flaming Bunny Clan

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