I didn't see a feedback thread on the previewed version of the DoD module, and wanted to leave some feedback. Hope this is a useful place.
1) Its absolutely gorgeous. The artistic value is through the roof for such things. And the game design sounds fun (haven't had a chance to play it yet to say more than just "sounds").
2) The recently added build guide is extremely helpful. At the full release, is this expected to be another file or folded in to the module PDF? (Either as an appendix, or broken out in-line as each encounter is dealt with)
3) I would love to see what the PF appendix looks like. Will it be equally graphical? or just raw text?
4) Regarding player handouts, I think you'll want to think a bit more about how to integrate them into the document. As they are now, they fall scattered throughout the document, where it makes sense for page layout reasons/GM narrative. Not where they make sense for quickly printing a set of handouts. Given that its "only" a PDF and you don't need to worry about page counts/etc. I'd suggest repeating the complete set of handouts as another appendix or separate PDF file.
5) Check the pagination, somewhere around Encounter 3 the even/odd pages flip their left/right justification of page number for a few pages. I suspect a page was removed? I see it happening a couple more times. Center justification might be simpler to avoid last minute problems as other stuff changes. (Even if its a bit more intrusive into the layout of the two page spreads).
Two pieces of more minor feedback following is from the perspective of someone who has been learning bookbinding and is excitedly planning how to apply my new hobby to making an awesome, I hope, set of bound volume(s) from this module. So I'm looking at things like how chapters are broken up, in case, the volume grows larger than I can realistic home bind, when printed on paper that can support the full color illustrations (heavier weight that commercially printed books would use). So this feedback might be too special purpose for general use, feel free to ignore if it doesn't help other use cases
6) Possibly? consider moving all the "New Monsters" to a consolidated appendix. (One of my pet peeves in modules is having to flip around a lot when running them. I'd love to print this out multiple volumes (Narrative Adventure, Build Guide + Monsters + PF Appendix + Handouts). Yes I'd need two volumes open at a time, but unlikely to need to flip through either and lose my place(even with adding ribbon bookmarks). The page re-arrangement I can do on my own, but of course the page numbers get out of whack.
7) I had some concerns over the two-page encounter spread intros (only the intros not interior pages of the encounter). But I think I've convinced myself I can work around the issue if it comes up. (ie if I need to split the body of the module into two chunks/volumes, I can manually insert a pair of blank pages to avoid having chapters 'leak' across the volumes.